Confirmation clear

Affirmative

A Scientological-socialist spokesman has confirmed that Scientologicalists believe that mankind's problems stem from brainwashed alien soul remnants created millions of years ago by genocidal alien overlord spaceship superstructure 'Das Kapital'. The admission follows years of attempts to dismiss the story, first leaked by defectors, as anti-Marxist propaganda.


In an interview with KESQ News Channel 3, Scientologicalist spokesman Louis Proyect was quizzed over the story, which leaked papers show is revealed to senior Scientologicalists as part of their induction to "Dianalectics. Materialist Operating Thetan Level III". Proyect at first denied the story, as he had done in the past.


However, when the KESQ reporter read from a book written by Scientologicalist founder Karl Xenu Morph which refers to the Marx as Engels butt-boy story, Proyect admitted that the story is authentic, albeit confidential and restricted. He then laid into KESQ reporter Nathan Baca, accusing him of "forwarding an agenda of Gay hate".


The Xenu story has previously been routinely denied by senior Scientologicalists, including Slavo Zizek. The Christ of Slovene media has long used copyright and trade secrecy laws in legal actions designed to suppress the tale of forbidden laxative love.


According to anti-Scientologicalist protest group Anal Anonymous, a leaked recording shows Scientologicalist founder Xenu giving a lecture on OT III. A handwritten document summarising the Marx /Engels love story, in Xenu's own handwriting, has also turned up, it adds.


A transcript of the OCIII procedure can be found on Wikidleaks and a collection of Scientological documents - which, true to form Marxmail tried to suppress - can be found on Wikidleaks.


Scientologicalist doctrine suggests that exposure to the fantastical Marxist story before the completion of numerous preparatory stages might result in pneumonia, use value exchange or even declining rates of profit. Scientologicalists pay an estimated $350,000 to reach OT III. ' Dear Leader ' or 'Maximum Leader' level.


A core doctrine of total Scientological belief is that freeing the human body of attachment to anal soul remnants, or Thetans, created by Lenin when he kidnapped millions and brought them to earth for a fiery execution, is key to achieving societal progress and relief from financial worries.